When you’re retired, it’s great to be finished with regimented work life and have the opportunity to do the things you want. Spending more time with family and friends ranks high on the list for many retirees.
However, for some, that doesn’t necessarily mean long hours taking care of grandchildren. After all, we love our grandchildren, but being responsible for them for long stretches of time every week is, well, exhausting.
So how do we let our kids know we may not want to be at their beck and call when it comes to watching our grandchildren?
Speak up. If you want to start volunteering, take a painting class or travel cross-country, make sure your retirement plans are known ahead of time. Let your kids know that some blocks of your time are spoken for.
Cite specific days and times for what you can reasonably do. Set boundaries where you are comfortable, so you can enjoy your time with the kids without getting overwhelmed. For example, our editor’s mother swims on Wednesday mornings and golfs on Friday afternoons. It has been made (lovingly) clear that those stretches of time are off-limits.
Every family has different seasons, and, if you can, assure them of your assistance in hard times as needed. Be willing to provide help when it really counts, and try to remember how difficult it was to balance young family life.
At first, it may be hard for your son or daughter to see things from your point of view (and admittedly, arranging outside child care isn’t always easy) but unless you want to spend your retirement years changing diapers, wiping snotty noses and doing school drop-off, it’s probably in your best interest to speak up.
