It’s a startling statistic: 43% of older adults feel lonely on a regular basis. And, according to researchers at the University of California San Francisco, people who are lonely are at greater risk of developing health problems and accelerated decline.
You may be dealing with grief due to the loss of a spouse. You may have no family close by. You may feel a sense of emptiness, despite a worthwhile life. As psychotherapist Amy Morin points out, loneliness is not inevitable. “Loneliness can take a serious toll on our physical and mental health too,” says Morin.
Here, Morin, author of 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do, shares her thoughts on loneliness, and five ways to combat it effectively.
1. Broaden Your Social Network
Morin notes that for many of us, when a loved one dies, we don’t have anyone else to count on. “It’s easy to get stuck in a pattern where your world only revolves around your immediate family,” Morin says. “But when someone experiences a loss, either through divorce or a death, it can be devastating.”
To counter that, Morin says it’s important to make an effort to engage in meaningful relationships and broaden your social network. For example, there’s evidence that suggests volunteering as little as two hours per week can have incredible benefits to our health, longevity and well-being. And it’s easy to do. Taking classes, whether it’s knitting or computer skills, can also help you meet like-minded individuals who are open to companionship.
2. Use Technology To Your Advantage
The Department of Psychology at Michigan State University conducted a study exploring the impact of social technology usage among older adults. (For the purpose of this study, social technology use was assessed through five technology-based behaviors: e-mail, social networking, videoconference, instant messaging and smartphone use.) The results of the study were enlightening. Older adults with higher social technology use reported fewer chronic illnesses, a higher sense of well-being and fewer depressive symptoms, as well as reduced feelings of loneliness.
3. Socialize, Even If You’re An Introvert
Many people who are introverted need extra alone time to recharge. But being introverted doesn’t mean that you will feel your best being alone 24/7. “Just like extroverts should balance their lives with some level of solitude, introverts should seek balance in their lives also,” Morin adds. “Some level of social engagement is necessary for a rich and fulfilling life.”
4. Recognize The Circle Of Loneliness
Are you too lonely to know how to stop being lonely? It can be a self-defeating cycle. “Sometimes people who feel lonely hesitate to reach out to others or accept invitations to social engagements,” Morin says.”They lack energy, don’t feel like socializing, and assume they might drag everyone else down. But the more they stay home alone, the lonelier they’re likely to become.”
5. Seek Quality Relationships
When it comes to combating loneliness, the quality of our relationships can be much more important than the quantity. In other words, even if we spend a lot of time surrounded by people, we can still feel lonely. Focus on connecting in a meaningful way, rather than being the figurative life of the party.
In the end, everyone feels lonely at sometimes. However, it’s important to recognize that prolonged, regular loneliness won’t just affect your mood, but your health too.
